Hackfest 2022: Crimes of the Future

The 2022 Hackfest took place from Friday, September 9th through Sunday the 11th. A warm-up round occured on Thursday for those who did not get enough punishment the next three days. Johnny (Three-Time Hackfest Champion) and Teri Kast once again graciously hosted - thanks, guys! Their address is: 10815 140th St, Hugo, MN, 55038.

Results

Michael Allerding is our new Birdie King! Congrats, Ding!

The hated "Mr. T and the A Team" stormed back on Saturday from a significant deficit to win the team competition.

Here are the team results of the 2022 Hackfest. And here are the individual results of the 2022 Hackfest.

Rules

Here are the rules for the 2022 Hackfest.

Participants

Mike Allerding; Duane Anderson; Jeff Carter; Brian Dukart; Travis Fleming; Tim Hidani; James Hove; Phil Jirsa; Brett Johnson; John Kast; Jim "Special K" Kenealy; Chaz Larson; Roger Mahre; Gary Mullen-Schultz; Eric Petersen; David Read; Tom Sandberg; Trent Shipley.

Golf Venues

Thursday's practice round took place at Tanners Brook Golf Club. Tee times commenced at 12:24PM. Dinner was at the golf course.

Friday's rounds were at Logger's Trail Golf Course. The first group teed off at 1:03PM. There was a group get together after the rounds at the Kasts' palace. Directions to their house from the course are here.

For Saturday, we were at St. Croix National Golf Club. This day had a 12:50PM start. Directions from JK's house are here. Dinner was at Sal's Grill, 12010 Keystone Ave N, Stillwater, MN.

Sunday's round, which decided our new Birdie King, took place at New Richmond Golf Club. Our first group teed off at 7:30AM. Directions from JK's house are here.

Pre-Fest Note from the Artistic Director

Festers of the Hack Variety,

All Hail the Birdie King (who is currently chopping up some golf courses in Indiana, 6 rounds "For work"). And to a much lesser, and tepid, not turgid extent, MTAT.

Phil, the Cray had you pencilled in months ago, always good to see some grovelling, however. Don't worry, you will get better at it as your golf game inevitably gets worse. You are part of team MTAT (sorry).

I have attached the rules (looks like some formatting issues in groupings, but you'll get the gist). Official Hackfest Golf is Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, September 9th, 10th, and 11th. The courses have not yet been decided, but likely, not inevitably, east of the Metro out toward the Kast ranch. Thursday, September 8th, golf will probably someplace nice and expensive. The champions dinner will probably be Friday night (The Birdie King not arriving until Friday). John and I will get Thursday and Friday food sorted out.

Team Competition is Friday and Saturday, Birdie King is decided Saturday and Sunday.

$30 entry fee -pay me when you first see me. Cash, no EFTs or IOUs. To be paid out as approximately follows: $120 to the Birdie King winner of the individual title on Sunday; $30 to each winning team member; 2 skins each day Friday-Sunday in the amount of $25 each for lowest score (relative to par) on highest handicapped hole (or next, or next, etc. . . ) in each 9-hole format. If no single winner (ties among teams and individuals) the money is pushed to up the value of the rest of the skins.

Because most of you are exceedly stupid and the rest are too old to remember, your team memberships are as follows: Team F*** Those Guys(13 individual Birdie King Titles; Inaugural Team Champions): Duane, Panther, Chaz, Travis, Brett, Gary, Jeff, Birdie King, Duke. Mr. T. and A Team(14 individual Birdie King Titles; one very lucky Team Championship) : John ( A 3-Time Hackfest Champion), Phil, Roger (An Essentially one-armed 3-Time Hackfest Champion), Eric, Ding, Trent, Spesh, Tim, Tom

More info as the blessed event approaches. Enjoy the rest of your summer, it is all downhill to the Fest.

Your, in stunning 3-D, Artistic Director
Brett Johnson, BA, MA, Ph.D., JD